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Question: Help! in need of relationship advice please! serious answers only please?

(Posted by: on 2010-09-01 08:08:26)

Let me start by giving some stats Me: Senior in college, no kids, job, car Current GF: 2 kids, no job, not in school, own place Girl I have a crush on: 2 jobs, car, own place, no kids I know this may seem like an easy decision but I've been with her for 1 1/ 2 years. I love her, but our relationship (at times) seems to have no real future. What should I do? Would it be superficial to leave her for a girl that's better suited for my needs and lifestyle? Please give me your opinion, and let me know if you need any additional info. Wow thanks for all the answers they're very helpful. I've come to the conclusion that I need to think a little harder about this lol. Also some additional info on the girl I have a crush on. We've been friends and I've had a crush on her since high school (about 6 years). It seems like we have more in common than me and my current gf, HOWEVER the grass is def always greener on the other side. Gonna take more time to think tho. Thanks guys!

Posted by: nsena31 on 2010-09-01, 08:10:54

It's not superficial to want what's best for you. It sounds like your current gf isn't treating you the way you deserve and that you have no desire to continue the relationship. Its best if you move on and it sounds like you've already started.

Posted by: Matt on 2010-09-01, 08:11:13

You should always go with what's best suited for you. If you don't think that she is right for you then you should break up with her. Hope this helps

Posted by: Dennis B on 2010-09-01, 08:11:26

In a heartbeat, it is very noble of you to be with this girl and probably take care of her kids once in a while, but you got into a pre-made family and honestly, making your own family is much more rewarding.

Posted by: Josh Ovens on 2010-09-01, 08:12:08

It Honestly Sounds Like You Have Already Made Your Decision

Posted by: Dan on 2010-09-01, 08:13:14

The girl you have a crush on is the one that I would go for, with kids in the picture and I am assuming that you are a young guy being a senior in college, I would not want to be tied down with a woman who has two kids in the picture. She kind of sounds like she doesn't have her shit together if she is not in school nor a job and has two kids. Hate to be cynical but she may be looking for a "baby daddy " and an income so that she continue not having to work.

Posted by: Emma on 2010-09-01, 08:14:08

The girl you have a crush on. Obvious. You wouldn't be asking this question if you thought your relationship with your current girlfriend was stable. You're not able to see a future with your gf and maybe it is best to be with someone who you think is right.

Posted by: GoCowboys!!! on 2010-09-01, 08:15:22

Ask yourself, are you still in-love with your current girlfriend first...and I know its not right to judge people based on their situation, but 2 kids that are not yours may not be what you want. It seems as if you're getting to the point where the relationship works, but you not sure if this is really what you want for the rest of your life. I say think about it really hard and if you're okay with not being with your current GF then go for it. It would be worse to hang-on knowing how you feel and just basically leading her own because you don't want to hurt her feelings than it would be to just end it now that way she can get over it and try to move on and you can do the same. You are not married yet, and with that said I would not force myself into a situation that will be the rest of my life unless I was 100% sure thats what I wanted. If you guys were married, then yea thats wrong. But right now, if you know deep down this is not who you see your future with, then I say stop wasting each other's time... Just a piece of advice I like to give when I can... When you're with a person because of what you HAD in the PAST, and not because of what you will HAVE in the FUTURE...then its time to give it up.

Posted by: liz on 2010-09-01, 08:15:56

No its not superficial at all, you are clearly unhappy with your current situation and everyone deserves to be happy in life, maybe your current gf would welcome getting out of this dull relationship too so talk to her and see where you go from here.

Posted by: Laquitta on 2010-09-01, 08:16:30

I don't think it would be superficial to leave her. It's just depend your relationship with your current girlfriend is worth fixing. I would try to talk with her to see where the problem is first though.

Posted by: Lulalutu on 2010-09-01, 08:17:25

If it seems like your relationship doesn't have a future then there isn't much point, you are obviously going to care about her a lot after being with her for 1 and 1/ 2 years but that doesn't neceseraly mean that you still like her in that way, especially if you have crushes on other girls. I think you should talk to your girlfriend about your future together and see what she thinks, a relationship should be one you enjoy being in and one you feel right in. Maybe it's time for a change, good luck!

Posted by: Favre 4 2010 on 2010-09-01, 08:17:40

On paper the easy answer is the 2nd choice. But if one suits your needs financially and with less baggage doesn't mean she will suit them emotionally. The grass isn't always greener. But you really have to think long and hard about this. If you leave only to find out she isn't want you wanted know that you may risk losing the first girl. Without really being in the exact situation it would be hard. But then again you wouldn't be 'crushing' or contemplating on being with girl number two if there wasn't something missing with girl number one. You have to find out what that is and see if it can be changed if you love number one. Otherwise you'll end up without either of them.