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Question: Question regarding couples counseling?

(Posted by: on 2012-01-25 10:03:19)

My boyfriend has cheated on me multiple times in the past and now I have major trust issues with him, and he knows it will take a long time before I will ever forgive him. He has changed greatly and the situation between us now is quite fine but there is place for improvement when it comes to understanding and trust esp when it comes to me. Due to my trust issues I am constantly stressed and I am very rarely ever able to rest mentally which has resulted in great tiredness and relapses of depression. Could couples counseling work? What's your personal experience with couples counseling?

Posted by: Shhh Shhh on 2012-01-25, 10:08:30

If your boyfriend cheated on you once then I would agree with you about working on your relationship. However he cheated on you multiple times, and you are stressed, unable to rest, tired, and depressed. I fail to see how someone is worth all that. I know starting over is hard, but in the long run please see that you deserve better, you deserve to be treated better, and you don't deserve to feel so badly as a result of your boyfriend. Boyfriends are supposed to make you feel great and bring out the best in you! Consider treating yourself better, breaking up with him, take time for yourself to get better then find someone worthy of you. Good luck!

Posted by: TreyMacG on 2012-01-25, 10:12:13

Your just a fool for wanting to make it work after "multiple " instances of cheating. No amount of counseling will help you get over this.

Posted by: Marissa on 2012-01-25, 10:49:02

The fact that he cheated multiple times is a bit concerning. I can't say I would stay in that relationship. But, if you truly love him and want to make it work, then counseling will definitely help. Your counselor will use different techniques to help both of you open up more and overcome any obstacles. Keep in mind, though, that counseling won't work unless you're both open to it. So make sure your boyfriend will be open-minded and on the same page as you. There's also always a chance that the counseling won't make any major breakthroughs. Sometimes relationships just aren't meant to be, and there's not much you can do about that. As for the trust issues, if that's not solved in couples therapy, I would suggest maybe seeing a counselor on your own. Situations like these can lead to long-term trust issues that could hold you back from future relationships. Overall, though, I think that you should definitely try out couples therapy. There's nothing to lose by trying it out.